So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
