we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
