She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
