All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Randomize
