You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
