Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
