i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
