omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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