Whats the glycemic index on semen?
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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