I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
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