how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Betty ford says i'm here all night
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
is this the sara with the beer cane?
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Randomize
