Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize
