You made me cry and you don't even care
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
