dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
We had sex on a dog bed..
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
