And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
