ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
