I want to have your abortion
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Randomize
