i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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