No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
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