I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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