I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Randomize
