thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
More tranny stories later!
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
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