We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Randomize
