I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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