What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
my being single is dangerous.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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