and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
should my penis look like a turkey
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
