two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize