Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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