Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Randomize
