with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
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