i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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