i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize