IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Sorry about my life...
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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