Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Randomize
