Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
