I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
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How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
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We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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