I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
If its not for food we ain't going out.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Randomize
