Moan for me like Helen Keller
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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