When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Come share oat with me in your robe
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
