Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
