i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
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