What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Randomize
