I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize