oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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