White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
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