It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Randomize
