Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
