Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
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