And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
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