just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize
